Standing at the entrance to an open door,
Greeted by the silence inside of the room,
Another April has come and it too shall pass,
And I’ll still be here lost and empty handed.
This disappointment I cannot stand anymore,
All of the things said about me are all true,
I’m too cold and bitter for love to ever last,
Not to mention I cannot even understand it.
I’m too smart for this I keep telling myself,
But I’m really too stupid to see my mistakes,
I’m fucking up even when I think I am right,
And I don’t want to let anyone down again.
I’d drown myself in an ocean if it would help,
But who would search for my body anyway?
I would run away in the middle of the night,
But there’s nothing for me on the other end.
I’ve run out of apologies, I’ve used them all,
Although ninety-nine percent fell on deaf ears,
The stares on their faces never even changed,
As their eyes pierce straight through my soul.
My time is up if I choose to answer the call,
I’m a memory now, why wait ten more years?
If you never met me it would spare you pain,
If only your wishes I were able to control.
I have a million more reasons to quit trying,
And only one good reason to possibly go on,
If I fell off of the face of the earth today,
It means that everybody else will have won.
Imagine all the people who won’t be crying,
The day they never figured out I was gone,
Everything else would feel exactly the same,
Just another dead memory beneath the sun.