I’ve hit rock bottom so many times,
The only place left for me to go,
Will be six feet into the ground.
My smile is an elaborate design,
Built around lying to those I know,
So they won’t follow me down.
I find hope in the worst places,
Just to justify things being okay,
When I’m ready to hang myself.
I see only tragedy in new faces,
They all seem to treat me the same,
I wonder if I’m already in hell.
I know what I’m doing is wrong,
Every single thing I do really is,
A problem in someone else’s eyes.
My nose is where it doesn’t belong,
It’s my only reason to even live,
Since I’m the only one on my side.
All of my idols are long, long gone,
My habits won’t kill me fast enough,
And cash truly does buy happiness.
My soul has already been pawned,
And sold for meaningless stuff,
All of which are like me, useless.
I want this to all get over with,
Quickly and painlessly almost like,
Waking up from a dream in a movie.
I want to amount to more than this,
I’m tired of always losing the fight,
And sick of being only a nobody.
I do not feel like a human being,
I feel too meaningless and hollow,
Living is no fun when you’re dead.
I always have this same feeling,
And it never hits me until tomorrow.
I should have just stayed in bed.